I want to start this review by saying I do not like slasher films. On the whole I find them pointless – usually involving mysterious guys in masks stomping around chopping people up in gory ways just because. That makes no sense to me. “You’re Next” was recommended to me as being not that kind of film – villains with actual motives, a believable final girl, and an actual plot. I found it had enough of those things that I did enjoy it, but not to the extent that I was told. (There will be spoilers.)

I will start with the things I did like. The final girl, Erin (Sharni Vinson), is a character with expertise to back up her actions. Her experience does not stop her being scared, and we see that on many occasions. I like that the final girl does not survive due to luck or magically managing to do things she does not actually know how to do. Erin’s upbringing in a ‘survivalist compound’ gives her a backstory that accounts for her skills. As an Australian myself, I have to say that this concept sounds more like an American thing than an Australian one, but I don’t think that’s really a problem here. I do have to ask one question about her – has she killed before? All the preparation in the world does not necessarily prepare you psychologically for actually taking a life. She doesn’t hesitate, which might be training taking over (after all, soldiers are trained like this) but I don’t see her being affected as much afterwards. I think there should have been something to show that she was feeling horrified by having to kill someone. Nevertheless, I enjoyed her as a character and I was definitely rooting for her to win.

There are quite a few problems with this movie, some of which make me feel that scenes might have been cut or the script pared down. Why I think this is because there are the echoes of character motivations and actions but not enough to explain why people are doing what they do. It is way too obvious who is behind the attack. Crispian’s reason for leaving the house is suspicious, not to mention his insistence that Erin does not accompany him. Felix and his girlfriend are not acting frightened enough – when Erin takes down one of the attackers they just stand there and watch. It is obvious that they are not as frightened and shocked as they should be under the circumstances. So the brothers’ involvement is telegraphed very early on. This is just the first of many issues with the film.

Who are the attackers? We see them wearing mysterious and creepy masks, and at the start of the show they attack and kill a couple who we find out later are the family’s neighbours. It appears they are the only near neighbours and we can assume they were killed so no one could raise the alarm. But why were they killed in the same way? Why the masks, why the ‘you’re next’ scrawled in blood. Was it a practice run? If it was just about getting them out of the way, why not just shoot them and be done?

This leads us to the next million-dollar question – why no guns? This is set in America, and I get the impression that it is relatively easy to buy guns. So why were they running around with crossbows and axes and so on. We get the hint that they might be military (I am basing this on one line only, when Felix says ‘I know you served together’). They are not convincing as military, however. They show capability, sure, and the one doing most of the crossbow shooting is a decent shot. But there are a couple of problems which tell against this. I do not see experienced military who have taken a job like this for pay would be interested in stuffing around with axes and messages in blood. We are given to understand that the whole motive for this is financial. So why not break in while they’re all at dinner, take out the six people who are the actual targets, make it convincing enough that the others can ‘escape’ so Erin is convinced they were also going to be killed, and then run for it. All this lurking in the dark (not to mention one of them camping out in the house), trip wires, and spooky masks seems 1) theatrical, and 2) personal. Also, when one of the assailants sees one booby trap and assumes that’s all there is, consequently stepping right on the second one, seems like a rookie move. By this time, they should have realised Erin is an opponent with skills and knowledge. There is no indication they are taking her seriously.

Felix and Crispian simply want to inherit the money, so they say. Again, let’s go back to the method. It’s too bloody and cruel and strikes me as far more personal than mere financial motive. We see early in the movie that Crispian has a bad relationship with Drake the eldest brother. When an argument breaks out between them the parents tell Crispian off, suggesting they may have sided with Drake’s bullying in their youth.  It is the only indication that there has been anything wrong in the family and does not seem worth the level of violence both Crispian and Felix condone. It seems like the brothers want the rest to suffer and be afraid.  In my opinion, if its just about money it doesn’t make sense, and if we are supposed to believe it is more personal, then more information should be provided.

The brothers seem to have psychological problems (not surprising.) Felix is very put out about killing Drake – not because he didn’t want to kill him, but he berates the attackers that they were paid to do this and complains that they ‘made him’ kill his brother. It is a very twisted take on the situation. His girlfriend, Zee, is just as peculiar, asking Felix to have sex with her on the bed where his mother is lying dead. He is disgusted by this, and she complains he never wants to have fun. It would appear that they are birds of a feather. Crispian, once he appears in the house and Erin has discovered he was in on it, announces he is a pacifist and couldn’t possibly hang around for the bloodshed. (it would appear pacifism doesn’t include arranging the bloodshed.) Crispian tells her that she was meant to be an unbiased witness (I didn’t see any real effort on the part of the attackers not to target her, even before she fought back), so I don’t think this is plausible. Crispian also complains that she wasn’t supposed to be able to fight back and that she has ruined their plans by doing so. Both brothers show very weird behaviour and attitudes. This would have made more sense if it had tied in with the plot – years of abuse as children, mental illness in the family, etc. This would also tie up the problem of the more brutal kills. But it is not tied up. It is just left dangling.

It is an exciting movie as far as it goes, and I didn’t hate it. I just did not find it psychologically convincing. The film makers have tried to make a slasher with motive and plot, but they didn’t really land it. In short, “You’re Next” is a mildly entertaining movie, but it is not a good one.